15 More Things My Husband Unconditionally, Totally Must Know About Me

Dear Mimi,

We’re back with the weirdness confessions, so here we go!


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Am I making you hungry yet?

  1. The only salad I like is from Olive Garden (And I don’t like salad dressing. Not really a salad person).
  2. I cannot do a cartwheel to save my life and I don’t think I’ll ever be able to. We had a unit in first grade gym where we had to learn cartwheels and needless to say, I failed miserably.
  3. When I first saw the word “epitome”, I thought it was pronounced “epi-toume” (like ‘epi-tomb’, without the ‘b’ at the end).
  4. 7 is my favorite number. (Fun fact: It was also my roll number every year til 8th grade).
  5. I think white chocolate is underrated.
  6. Lou Malnati’s is my favorite deep dish pizza (aka the best deep dish in Chicago).
  7. I didn’t know what a “block” was until I was 18 and started going to school in the city. If someone told me to walk 3 blocks, I’d just get more confused.
  8. I have 2 stretch marks on my left knee and I have no clue as to how they came into existence.
  9. My favorite Disney movie is the Lion King. I’ve always wanted to go see it on Broadway.
  10. If I see an actor/actress in a movie or TV show that I recognize from somewhere else, I HAVE to figure out where they’re from, otherwise I cannot focus on what I am currently viewing.
  11. I don’t like water with the “added for taste” minerals. (Water is supposed to be tasteless. Why ruin a good thing with minerals?)
  12. For the longest time, I thought the phrase “beggars can’t be choosers” was actually “buyers can’t be choosers”. (Don’t worry. I see the flaw in my thinking now.)
  13. One of my earliest memories is looking out of a huge window wall in Switzerland and seeing all the snow on the mountains.
  14. My first pet was a guppy fish named Ruby who lived for two years.
  15. I can only wink one eye and raise one eyebrow, both on the left side.

Here’s to being weird Mimi. May we all find someone whose weirdness is just as crazy as ours.

Love,

Didi

Being called weird is like being called limited edition. It means you’re something that people don’t see that often. Remember that.

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Blogging the Bachelor: Women Tell All

Dear Mimi,

Choo choo! Jump aboard the drama train, cuz it’s a movin’! All these crazy women are back, ladies and gentlemen!

And finally, you're actually aware that New Mexico is in the United States unlike some people.

First Chris^2 go party crashing around LA. I didn’t even know that people had Bachelor viewing parties. Is this a thing? It’s literally a bunch of screaming girls jumping all over the place. Why, just why?! I will never understand. Chris says there’s nothing more fun than going around with Chris Harrison doing this. Really Chris, because I can think of 2782935792385 more things more fun than being surrounded by estrogen filled women with nothing better to do on Monday nights.

Wow, Chris actually begins by setting the scene like “A Tale of Two Cities” with that exact same opening line. Yeah cuz the Bachelor is exactly like the start of the French Revolution. Makes perfect sense. Next come the girls. I forgot how many there were.

After watching the playback (dang there really was a loooooooot of drama this season), Britt starts getting emotional and asks Carly why she pretended to be her friend the whole time. She described a scenario where they were having deep conversations and listening to music together and Carly doesn’t know what to say. She is literally trying to come up with a decent answer on the spot. Chris H. then calls Britt up to the “hot seat”. Then Jillian, out of nowhere, starts bashing Carly about how mean she was to Britt and tensions are running high. I’m talking like outer space high. Chris asks Jade what she thought and of course she agrees with Carly and you can see how people are taking sides based on their friendships.

I don’t know how to exactly narrate what happened next, but Chris asks Britt if she really would have lived in Arlington and she says yes, while Carly tells an entirely different story. They argue a lot about what was said and what might have been taken the wrong way and Chris Harrison finally interrupts and declares that they will never see eye to eye, which is 149% true. Britt says that she went on the show to find love and she thinks that she would’ve ended up with Chris if it weren’t for Carly. They cut away for commercial and come back early to show Britt saying again, privately this time, to Chris Harrison that she really thinks she could’ve ended up with Chris. I disagree with this, because if you recall, Britt was already ready to leave the show the night she was sent home and that was NOT because of Carly. It was because of Kaitlyn getting the rose instead of her and she was upset about that. So, as far as that goes, I don’t really know how much I’m buying what she’s selling.

Continue reading

An Open Letter To My Fiancé’s Ex — ‘The One That Got Away’

Dear Mimi,

This is a post written by one of my closest friends. It describes, true, raw emotion of love, something I cannot describe to you yet, having never felt that before. I hope you read it and learn something, how to be vulnerable, how life can change, how love works.

Love,
Didi

Thought Catalog

Flickr / Richard P J LambertFlickr / Richard P J Lambert

Dear S,

Even though we’ve never met, I feel like I know you. Despite living at opposite ends of the country, we’re kind of like neighbors. Except, the space we share is in his heart. And here I am, finally doing what you weren’t able to finish. I’m sorry. But I won’t feel right proceeding without letting you know a few things.

I want you to know that I saw it. I saw the way he loved you. The way, because of you, for the first time in his life, he was happy. The way he wouldn’t even look at another girl because he was so captivated by you. I saw the way that even though he was here, back home physically, his mind and heart were back in California with you. I saw the way nothing else mattered to him. I saw that…

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Blogging the Bachelor: Week 9

Dear Mimi,

You already know what this is! Another week of the Bachelor! Let’s begin a dramatic new episode!

https://twentiestribe.files.wordpress.com/2014/08/giphy.gif?w=640(yay for gifs!)

So we (ha! We. Lol), excuse me, they are finally in Bali! It starts off showcasing Bali’s landscape, people and lifestyle, and in the middle of the island’s preview, they show a giant monkey’s face almost butting into the camera. Umm alrighty then, but I agree, monkeys would make me wanna tear my hair out less. Chris points out that there is so much culture in Bali. Well, guess what Chris? There’s actually people here too. Did you see them? Huh? Did ya, did ya, did ya?!

Chris goes on to the say that the resort he is staying at is the most beautiful resort he’s ever been to (read: only resort he’s ever been too) and that he can see himself coming back here for a honeymoon. You think your future wife would wanna come back to a place that you already checked out with not only her, but also two other exes? Let me answer that on behalf of all girls: Heck to the no.

First up is Kaitlyn, who still says “about” in a very cute Canadian way that I just cannot stop smiling everytime she says it. She also has a man laugh, which is very distinct compares to Chris’ girly giggles. But it’s okay because I’m pretty sure I have a man laugh too. Laughter ftw! They go to a temple and check out the spiritual aspects of it while balancing baskets on their heads. The ladies who actually wanted to visit the temple probably just let them do it so they could get out of there, let’s be honest here. Then, they go to a monkey garden and omg, this was hilarious! I’m not even kidding! Seeing all those monkeys grab the bananas from Chris’ hands was so funny and it was even more entertaining to hear Kaitlyn just guffawing away in the background. Wow, that was pure, actual, good amusement that I was not expecting.

A monkey pees on Chris LOL

A monkey pees on Chris LOL

Then we get into the gross mushy gushy. This week seems to be a lot about feelings and “serious conversations” which you know I’m not a fan out. Feelings are not my forte. And this week is called overnight dates, which I’ll leave it at that. I’m not going to reiterate the very double meaning sentences Chris used to explain it at the beginning of the episode. Enough said. The talk will come when it needs to hun.

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They go to some kind of resort thing (is it the same one Chris is staying at?) and THEY DO NOT EAT AT ALL. In fact, now that I think about it, I don’t think I have ever seen them eating on ANY date where there is food. I see them drinking, sure, but eating? Never. Is the food even real? If so, why are they wasting it?! It’s not possible that y’all are never hungry! Aaaaahhhh! My money bets that it’s plastic. Continue reading

Blogging the Bachelor: Week 8

Dear Mimi,

Hopefully this post will be shorter than the last, so here goes nothing. Welcome to hometown week y’all!

But, before that, we have the drama with Britt. As the rest of the girls talk about what happened the night before (read: gossip and overanalyze), Britt comes in and tells all of them that she is leaving. She doesn’t think that Chris is the man for her and doesn’t want to introduce him to her family next week. DIDN’T I CALL THIS? Read the last post if you don’t believe me! Carly does 436457389475 different voiceovers/interviews explaining how Britt always wants to be the center of attention, how she wants Chris to fight for her, how she is always so used to getting what she wants and when she finally realizes that Chris is forming relationships with other people, Britt wants to get out while she still can without looking like she was dumped. Carly goes “I don’t feel bad for Britt at all. It’s fun to see her squirm”. Homegirl even calls Britt out pretty much saying that “you say you are leaving now, but after you talk with Chris, you’re going to magically stay because you always change your mind whenever Chris tells you something and you always manipulate him”. Okay maybe not that last part directly, but it was inferred (confirmed in the 436457389476th interview). Well be careful Carls, because karma has a way of working things in lightning speed on the Bachelor. (Remember what happened to Kelsey and Ashley?)

I know what you did.

I know what you did.

ha! karma!

ha! karma!

Oh and through all of this, Becca has a date! Nothing much happened except they chill at Chris’ apartment, which looked like my hotel room from when I stayed at Yellowstone National Park, and they watch the sunset. Becca tells Chris she has never been in love. Join the club Becca.

“Up next, it’s the most dramatic rose ceremony ever” *Chris Harrison voice*. Yeah, cuz you’ve only been saying that for 8 weeks in a row now. There is no time to talk because Chris has made up his mind. In the middle of facing the girls and talking, right before he is going to hand out roses, Britt interrupts him and they go somewhere else to talk. RIGHT after they leave, all the girls start gossiping like little old ladies again. I’m surprised Britt and Chris didn’t hear them on their way out of the room; it was that instant.

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Continue reading

15 Important Things My Husband Absolutely, Positively, Most Definitely Has to Know About Me

Dear Mimi,

There comes a time after you get married (I wouldn’t know, but I’m just assuming lol) where your weirdness slowly starts to creep out. Well, I’m gonna do my future husband a favor and just let it all out at once haha 😉 I present to you, the 15 most important things my husband NEEDS to know about me if he wants to survive. Muahahahahaha!

Ugggghhhh.

Ugggghhhh.

  1. I once stole a shopping cart from a store and pushed it 2 miles back to my dorm while studying abroad in Turkey (in my defense we had a lot of groceries, it was over 100°F out, and we were exhausted/fasting).
  2. Apple cider vinegar smells like feet to me and is the bane of my existence.
  3. In 7th grade, I broke my foot by dropping a shampoo bottle on it (2 days before a trip overseas).
  4. Mango juice and strawberry milkshakes are the way to my heart (and washing the dishes).
  5. I am a picture hoarder (you never know when you might need to pull up the 3 billion pictures of your cat).
  6. I have a taste aversion to Taco Bell (sorry bro, can’t ever go there. at least not with me)
  7. The best pick up line I’ve ever heard was “Do you like free food?” (That should already tell you a lot about me off the bat).
  8. I say ‘duck’ tape instead of ‘duct tape’ and ‘sherbert’ instead of ‘sherbet’.
  9. According to one of my friends, my face feels like pudding and I use too much moisturizer (I apologize for my friend’s lack of boundaries).
  10. I never know how to pronounce ‘Oberweis’ from “Oberweis Ice Cream” (everyone I ask says something different!)
  11. I give my cat a shower twice a year.
  12. 2:17 is my favorite time (it is so randomly exquisite).
  13. Caffeine does not work on me. I can drink a whole cup of coffee or an entire can of pop and go right to sleep.
  14. I hate the following words and phrases: cool beans, totes, adorbs, perf, slay, yaaaas!, on fleek, can’t even (learn to speak like an educated adult people! have a shred a dignity!)
  15. I used to be afraid of geese (USED TO BE).

So there you have it Mimi. Wish him luck, he’s gonna need it.

Love,

Didi

Sometimes, I pretend to be normal, but it gets boring. So I go back to being me.