4AM Friends

Dear Mimi,

Awhile ago, I met this guy who was absolutely incredible. Smart, tall, funny, handsome, and more, he was everything I had ever wanted. Naturally, what is the first thing I did after I met said guy? I’m a girl, so obviously I’m gonna tell my best friends.

Now, here’s the thing about our friendship. We don’t see each other often, but when we do, we hang out for hours and talk about everything. It’s like there was never a break in between. Sure, sometimes we text each other, and talk on the phone, but nothing beats in-person conversation.

So one night, after getting frappés from McDonald’s, we sat in her car in my driveway, as I told her all about him. I vented to her about my insecurities, how I was excited, yet terrified, eager, yet cautious. After listening to me get giddy over some dude I had only met a few times, she asked me a question, “How much do you think it’ll wreck you if it doesn’t work out?”

At the time, it was a slap in the face. I paused out of shock and she repeated herself. I answered honestly, but I was baffled. Why would she ask me something like that? Shouldn’t she be excited for me? I know she wasn’t jealous since she was already engaged, and I was so confused. Why would she think about that? Even I hadn’t thought about that. And why would she choose that as the first question to ask? What kind of person does that?

Well Mimi, a true friend does that.

You see, she was asking me the questions I was too afraid to ask myself. She was protecting me from getting hurt or getting too entangled by making me consider a possibility I didn’t want to. She, in her own subtle way, was reminding me to ground myself. If she had told me straight up, perhaps I wouldn’t have listened so attentively.

These are the friends we need Mimi. Friends who see things that we don’t; friends that understand us, sometimes, better than we understand ourselves. Friends who will always want the best for you and will do whatever it takes to make sure you get it, even if they know the truth will hurt you.

Find these friends, and hold on to them. Those who aren’t afraid to tell it like it is. Those who will support you even if they don’t agree with you. Those who make you think about what you really want. Those who push you to your limits and encourage your dreams. Those who make you think about all the possibilities. Those who will lift you up when it seems everyone else is pushing you down. Those who see the light in you when you’re convinced that it’s gone. Those who include you in their futures. Those who you can spend hours laughing with. Those who are your soulmates before any guy ever was. Those who feel lucky to have a friend like you. Those who already know your deepest and darkest fears. Those who you can spend forever with and still not run out of things to discuss. Those who make you feel like together, you can rule the world. Those who you trust. Those who you can call at 4AM.

One of my favorite sayings (hadiths) of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW) says that “souls that recognize each another unite in harmony, and those that do not are at odds”. This means that we knew our friends in heaven, and God has blessed us with meeting them again on the Earth. May He grant us all friends that we will reunite with again in Heaven, and until then, make the journey on Earth a little more enjoyable.

Love,

Didi

Friends show their love in times of trouble, not in happiness. ~Euripides

True friends say good things behind your back, and bad things to your face.

 

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20 More Inspirational Quotes AKA 20 New Quotes to Caption Your Instagram Photos With

Dear Mimi,

Here are some more immature baby quotes for not so immature babies (so for mature babies, immature adults, mature adults, the possibilities are endless).

By the way, I had written these down a while ago and for some reason I didn’t think it was important to write down the author. But no worries, a quick Google search will solve that problem for ya.

  1. The cost of not following your heart is spending the rest of your life wishing you had.
  2. Begin with where you are now. Begin with your tremblings, your earthquake. The universe didn’t start with a sigh, but with a bang. So begin. The stars inside you are waiting.
  3. It was sunsets that taught me that beauty sometimes only lasts for a couple of moments, and it was sunrises that showed me that all it takes is patience to experience it all over again.
  4. The wound is the place where the light enters you.
  5. How we walk with the broken speaks louder than how we sit with the great.
  6. You don’t drown by falling in the water. You drown by staying there.
  7. Fear is the devil’s greatest illusion.
  8. Don’t settle. Don’t finish crappy books. If you don’t like the menu, leave the restaurant. If you’re not on the right path, get off it.
  9. Fate whispers to the warrior, ‘You cannot withstand this storm’. And the warrior whispers back, ‘I am the storm’.
  10. The strength of a woman is not measured by the impact that all her hardships in life have had on her; but the strength of a woman is measured by the extent of her refusal to allow those hardships to dictate her and who she becomes.
  11. Even with a broken wing, she decides to fly, hoping the wounds would heal in flight.
  12. Be soft. Do not let the world make you hard. Do not let pain make you hate. Do not let bitterness steal your sweetness.
  13. This isn’t where the book ends. It’s just where the chapter turns into another. A turning page is also a turning point. Inked progression. Let this pen move freely.
  14. They say good things take time. But really great things happen in the blink of an eye.
  15. Don’t turn away when it gets dishearteningly difficult, because when we step onto flights towards skies that best suit us, the storms are always worth swallowing. Learn to use the lightening as fiery fuel to further propel you to all that encourages your own aliveness. Life simply moves too swiftly for anything less.
  16. One day, your heart will stop beating and none of your fears will matter. What will matter is how you lived.
  17. By choosing to be our most authentic and loving self, we leave a trail of magic everywhere we go.
  18. Someday, we’ll forget the hurt, the reason we cried, and the one who brought the pain. We will finally realize that the secret of being free is not revenge, but letting things unfold in their own ways and time. After all, what matters is not the first, but the last chapter of our lives which shows how well we ran the race. So smile, laugh, forgive, believe, and LOVE over and over again.
  19. You can’t calm the storm, so stop trying. What you can do is calm yourself. The storm will pass.
  20. She was hurting, but she didn’t run away from it. She embraced the pain, because when it is deep, that is what has to be done. You have to feel your way out of the darkness when you can’t see the light.

Love,

Didi

20 Little Known Inspirational Quotes AKA 20 New Quotes to Caption Your Facebook Photos With

Dear Mimi,

Quotes are the best because often times, someone else speaks the words better than we can speak them ourselves. Here are some of the lesser known quotes, yet still powerful. And the ones that really haven’t made the 428 rounds on Facebook/Twitter/Instagram/Tumblr to gain the rite of passage of being an “actual quote” yet. Does that make these immature baby quotes?

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

  1. “If you hear a voice within you say ‘you cannot paint,’ then by all means paint and that voice will be silenced.” –Vincent Van Gogh
  1. “When we love, we always strive to become better than we are. When we strive to become better than we are, everything around us becomes better too.” –Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist 
  1. “You never have to change anything you got up in the middle of the night to write.” –Saul Bellow
  1. “The firmest friendships have been formed in mutual adversity,
    as iron is most strongly united by the fiercest flame.” –Charles Caleb Colton
  1. “In the sky there are always answers and explanations for everything: every pain, every suffering, joy and confusion.” –Ishmael Beah, A Long Way Gone: Memoirs of a Boy Soldier
  1. “You must give everything to make your life as beautiful as the dreams that dance in your imagination.” –Roman Payne
  1. “The fact that you are still alive assures you that God has something for you to accomplish.” –Rodney A. Winters
  1. “We can become inspired to shape a higher, more ideal future, and when we do, miracles happen.” –James Redfield, The Tenth Insight: Holding the Vision
  1. “You never know when the truth will come home. You can’t choose the time. The time chooses you.” –Rick Yancey, The Infinite Sea
  1. “I’ve come to realize that sometimes, what you love most is what you have to fight the hardest to keep.” –Kirsten Hubbard, Wanderlove
  1. “To recognize that the greatest error is not to have tried and failed, but that in trying, we did not give it our best effort.” –Gene Kranz
  1. “The most powerful weapon on Earth is the human soul on fire.” –Dale Partridge
  1. “Failure is when you give up. A real winner is someone that doesn’t give up, even when it feels like they are losing.” –Joshua Hartzell
  1. “If pain is a pot of boiling water, humor can be the rising steam.” –Cameron Conaway, Caged: Memoirs of a Cage-Fighting Poet
  1. “I am not afraid of tomorrow for I have seen yesterday, I have today and I know Him who holds tomorrow so I know tomorrow will be beautiful for me.” –Jaachynma N.E. Agu, The Best Option
  1. “We wait for the rains to cease, the clouds to part, and the sun to shine before saying life is good. Ironically, it is because we endure the storms that life seems so wonderfully bright at their passing.” –Richelle E. Goodrich
  1. “Keep smiling and one day, life will get tired of upsetting you.” –Unknown
  1. “Life is like a landscape. You like in the midst of it but can describe it only from the vantage point of distance.” – Charles Lindbergh
  1. “The more sand has escaped from the hourglass of life, the clearer we should see through it.” –Niccolo Machiavelli
  1. “We all have two lives. The second one starts when we realize we only have one.” –Tom Hiddleston

Love,

Didi

Why Do People Leave Each Other?

Dear Mimi,

In this part of the book, Sr. Yasmin mentions how attachment was her biggest weakness. And honestly, it is mine too. It’s really hard growing up away from all of your grandparents, uncles, aunts, and cousins, especially when everyone around you seemed to have all of theirs close by. Eids were lonely, Thanksgivings were hard, and it was difficult to not be able to enjoy your friends and family in the same place. It always felt like I had to choose: either go to India for 3 months and forget about spending summer with my friends, or stay here with my friends and miss out on family. It could never be combined.

The times I did have with my family though, were better than and closer to my heart than any of the times spent with my friends. Yes, alhumdulillah, my friends were great, but at the end of the day, I had to go home and they had to go home. With family though, they were your home. You never had to leave. They were a part of you, and you, a part of them. And of course, because I never saw them as often as I would’ve liked, they became my attachment. They became my test of patience in this dunya. Continue reading

Reclaim Your Heart by Yasmin Mogahed

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Dear Mimi,

Recently, I heard about a book called “Reclaim Your Heart” by Yasmin Mogahed. I knew people who have read it, including some of my friends, and claimed that it had changed their lives. Ever since I turned 20, and started the third, and probably most important, decade of my life (OMG I’m SO OLD!), I have been looking to change myself and start anew. They say that a person changes every ten years, and it seemed that my timeline was exactly on point.

So, in the spirit of 2015, new changes, and a better life, I bought the book. Everyone who has read this book has told me to think and reflect after each chapter. So, I will do that here, with you, so I can ventilate my thoughts, and you can learn from my experiences of this crazy thing called life. Of course, you can borrow the book anytime you want. But in the meantime (or if you’re too lazy to read it all haha, I meant the book, not the blog 😉 ), here goes.

Bismillah.

Love, Didi

Your heart knows things your mind can’t explain.