Blogging the Bachelor: Season 21, Episode 3

Dear Mimi,

It’s Tuesday in January, so you know what that means! Another installment of Blogging the Bachelor. Let’s see what is to be continued from last week.

Ignoring the crime show like “previously on The Bachelor”, right off the bat, Kristina and Whitney (look how great I’m getting with names!) and some other girls discuss what happened last night (aka his history with Liz). Oh jeez, they’re about to have a rose ceremony! I totally forgot they were going to have one of those. I was expecting them to just continue with the last group date. Anyway, there is a rose ceremony, and Nick comes in and explains the whole situation to all the girls. He claims that he’s an open book, but I’ve seen him quiver last week, so that’s questionable.

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Literally Nick

Blah, blah, blah, the girls are still discussing all of this with each other, and with Nick, so really nothing interesting here. Just a lot of disappointing build-up from ABC. Lacey (camel girl), however, brought up how Nick’s situation is similar to Andi and Kaitlyn, which they didn’t show the rest of, but I wish they had. At this point, it seems like Nick is just over talking about this whole thing, but that’s the only thing the girls are talking about it. Meanwhile, Nick and Danielle L. have a great conversation and even those on the moon can see that Nick is really nervous when he’s talking to her.

Oh look who’s back. It’s Corinne. Yay. Corrine is mad that someone else slept with Nick before her (yo dude, I’m pretty sure that list has a lot more girls than just Liz. He’s 35). And instead of being classy and just wearing a dress, well, let’s just say she’s only wearing a jacket so she can one-up everyone else. Are we secretly in a Nintendo Mario game during this rose ceremony?

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To Corinne, From the World

 

More talk about this whole dead-beat Liz situation. As Hailey roasts marshmallows with Nick, Corinne sneaks down like she’s on a heist, wearing a trench coat and everything. She just mumbles a bunch of BS about how she’s so happy and crap and asks Nick to fetch her some whip cream. What happens next is so awkward, I cannot even imagine what Nick is thinking right now. I know what I’m thinking Mimi, but that list of words is not appropriate for this space. All I can say is that this girl needs help. They guzzle a whole bunch of whip cream and it’s just not a pleasant sight. You know it’s bad when Nick actually pulls her jacket to cover herself up.

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It just gets a whole lot worse from here.

Jasmine B or G, the basketball dancer, interrupts them, because all the other girls kinda were watching from peep holes. Corinne goes into her room and cries about how Nick and her relationship is ruined and she wants to go home. Homegirl already has a rose mind you. Talk about needy. She also decides to go to sleep instead of attending the rose ceremony. Is that legal in the Bachelor world?

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Gotta one up those other girls, right?

Rose ceremony time! Roses go to… OH WAIT. Nick finally realizes Corinne is not there. Side note: Are the girls that have roses supposed to just walk around everywhere during the rose ceremony parties with their roses. Like hey, all y’all, I got a rose and you don’t. Nick is hella confused about why Corinne decided to go to bed instead of showing up to the rose ceremony and is finally, finally, FINALLY, starting to see that she might be a walking trainwreck.

Nick apologizes (idk for what?) and starts with the roses again. Astrid, Taylor, Whitney, Kristina (who again whines about her rose accepting ability), Danielle, Rachel (who I forgot about a little bit), Vanessa (who was also stating how she was nervous about their connection), Raven, Jaimi (who mentioned she was having chest pain over all this drama? Calm down honey), Dominique, Sarah, Alexis, Brittany, Josephine, Chris Harrison with the very unnecessary final rose reminder, which goes to Jasmine (who was freaking out and on the verge of tears, and thinks she’s going to throw up after receiving it). I’m not seeing the appeal of Nick to reach that point. Hailey cries because Nick didn’t think she deserved a rose, and sucks for Corinne, because her only friend Lacey also went home. Who will she spill her first world problems to now?

The next morning, Chris Harrison shows up and slyly pokes at Corinne for being well-rested, which the other girls aren’t, but with all the makeup, you could never tell. It’s already time for the next group date, which Chris says will blow everyone’s minds, but more specifically only Danielle’s, Christen’s, Kristina’s, Whitney’s, Taylor’s, Jasmine’s, and Corinne’s. The card only says Everybody, which duh, Backstreet Boys! They show up in the house! Are you serious!?!? And then they sing ‘That Way’!!! AAAAHHHHH! My inner fan girl is coming out.

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Next up, my favorite quote from this week. Corinne asks Jasmine “are you a dancer?”, to which Jasmine replies “girl, where you been? Sleeping?” HAHAHAHAHA! That was fantastic! Corinne explains to nobody that she’s a terrible dancer and demonstrates some of her moves, which are atrocious. Time to head over to Burbank Studios. Corinne goes “I’m more excited to see Nick than the Backstreet Boys”. This line alone 100% lets me know that she is, in fact, crazy, because I would be willing to bet good money that right now, Nick is more excited about the Backstreet Boys than her.

The girls find out that they will background dancers for their live show that night, in front of 500. They will be judging all the girls and the best one will get a personal serenade with Nick from the Backstreet Boys. Nick pretends to be territorial about all the girls. Danielle and obviously Jasmine. Poor Whitney seems too tall for this. Corinne is all the way in the back, doing what she does best: complaining. She says “I don’t feel pretty, cute, bubbly, confident, fun”. How do I say this nicely? You’re not. So while everyone is trying their best and practicing, she is pouting in the corner like one of the Dance Moms.

“I’m not a crybaby. Like I’m not gonna cry when the attention’s not on me” Corinne tells the camera as she is seen leaving the room. Actions speak louder than words, ever heard that? She cries in the bathroom and blames it on last night. She says something about how the harder she tries to be herself, she’s not herself? Don’t ask me, I’m just as confused, and over this chick. Heck, I was over her night 1.

It’s time for the big show! I actually think I heard about this show on the radio. Part of me is thinking that Danielle L might “win” the serenade. Let’s see what happens. Backstreets Back, alright! Nick comes out with the girls and I don’t think anyone knows who they are. At this point, I realize that there’s way too many people on stage right now, and I’m kinda getting a little claustrophobic. I’m sure they had a lot of fun though. And Danielle wins! I knew it! She is his fire and one desire LOL. 90s kid at heart here.

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I’m not gonna say anything about Corinne. I’ll just leave you with her face during the whole serenade. Nick is secretly telling Corinne, I want it that way.

It’s time for the dinner and drinks (mostly drinks) portion of the date and Corinne complains about how she didn’t want to see other girls with Nick in her face. Hey, does anyone remember what happened at the wedding photoshoot last week? Yeeeeahhhhh. She pulls him first, no surprises there. She calls choreography “planned dancing”. Wut? Corinne apologizes to Nick about being MIA at the rose ceremony and Nick asks her whether she talked to the girls about it, to which she replies that she didn’t think any of them cared. Cut to all the girls talking about how it was so disrespectful that she didn’t show up. Jasmine is sick of talking about Corinne and so am I.

The question of the night seems to be “Where is Corinne?” and it turns out she’s sleeping again. Maybe that’s why she needed to talk to Nick first, because she couldn’t keep her eyes open. Danielle tells Nick that she felt like she could fall in love with him and they kiss and dance again.

Back at the house, it’s time for the next date. Danielle M reads the card, which goes to Vanessa! “You make me feel like I’m floating”, the card reads. They’re all thinking hot air balloon, which from experience I can say is super fun.

Corinne wakes up from her nap and talks about how she can’t even handle herself, let alone a baby. I’m going to go ahead and ask the question all of us are thinking: WHY ARE YOU HERE? She exclaims she has to get Raquel ready for a baby and the girls finally find out that Corinne has a nanny. Oh God, what ensues after that, I wish I could just put in the video clip. It was insane! I’m just sitting here thinking, who would ever want to marry this girl? Maybe Kalon, that dirt bag that came in a helicopter. That would be the only person. Btw, I found the video, and I’m inserting it here for all your viewing pleasure:

 

Can we just get a reach on Raquel to ask her how she really feels about serving Corinne?

Jasmine, once again, says exactly what I said. Who would want to marry someone like that?! Well, luckily for us, the group date goes to Danielle, so yay! Both Danielles ftw! Corinne then proceeds to say that she thinks that Danielle is only beauty and nothing else, and I’m like oh hell naw! She then tells the camera about how she misses Raquel because she’s had to do “big girl” stuff like making her own breakfast, and waking herself up in the morning, and making her bed. No comment, I think I’ve already said plenty. I’ll leave you to form your own opinions.

Time for Vanessa’s date! They get to go on a zero gravity plane that mimics space and I really want to do this too! Looking inside this plane, it’s actually really cool, not gonna lie. For once, Chris Harrison did not over-exaggerate. I also really appreciate the producers’ choice of background music. I actually laughed out loud. I need to find out how to get on a place like this. They are literally floating. But, alas, as soon as Nick says, “It couldn’t be going any better”, Vanessa feels like she has to throw up. Why say stuff like that? Everyone should always say, it kinda sucks. That way, you know nothing will ever get messed up. Rules of psychology.

Vanessa is nauseous and it looks like she’s in labor. She’s just trying to puke, but she fails. Time for the white paper bag. Nick is actually really great about it and stayed by her, making her feel uncomfortable. In fact, Nick’s favorite moment was comforting Vanessa, which I had to admit was uber sweet. He then kisses her after she pukes. That’s some love right there.

The last date card for the week arrives and Rachel, Alexis, Astrid, Jaimi, Sarah, Brittany, and Dominique get to go. Nick is “ready to stop playing the field”. Brittany is way too excited for this date, which is making me think it’s not gonna go well for her.

Meanwhile, cue the romantic music for the continuation of Nick and Vanessa’s date. They go for dinner on top of the tallest building in LA and the 360 degree view of the city is incredible. Nick definitely pulled out all the stops for her on this date in general. Vanessa thanks Nick for taking care of her and tells him that while watching Andi’s season. The thing that struck her about Nick was how close he is to his mom and his family, which she found endearing. Her own grandfather passed away 3 weeks before she came, so she had doubts, but her family was very supportive.

The thing I really like about Vanessa is that she’s not afraid to be bold, without being weird or rude about it. She asks Nick why he would want to do this again. Their conversation is actually very natural and I see it. Nick actually starts tearing up while talking to her. I did have Vanessa going to the end and getting engaged to him, so I’m rooting for her, ya know? It’s time for the rose, which Vanessa, and I’m sure all of us had forgotten about, but of course, she gets it. It takes a special kinda girl to make a guy open up and cry a little.

*During the ad, I realize there’s only 25 minutes left for this last group date and what seems to be a pre-rose ceremony pool party, so I’m guessing this is another TBC episode and the actual rose ceremony is delayed to next week. Just sayin’.*

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For the last group date, they go to a track race and we see Nick running. I can just imagine the camera crew telling Nick “run” and they’re just going behind him lol. Dominique is doing a lot of talking, which again means either really good or really bad. I’m leaning towards the latter. Nick apparently did track in college and high school. Carl Lewis and 2 other Olympic athletes come out pretending to be Nick’s friends. The girls participate in a ‘Nickathalon’, which includes long jump, something else, and javelin throw. I’m pretty sure Nickolodeon has used that same world for one of their TV marathons.

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Just in case you were wondering, which you weren’t, this picture actually shows up when you Google Image “Nickathalon”

The Olympic athletes are the judges and they choose Rachel, Alexis, and Astrid. No surprises there. Of course, Dominique looks less than excited. The last event is called The Dash, in which they have to run to get a ring and then over to a hot tub where Nick is sitting. Rachel runs first, but flips the ring over. When she runs back to get it, she accidentally steps on it and meanwhile Astrid grabs the remaining piece of it and runs over to Nick. After things settle down a bit, Dominique (remember my prediction) starts doing that thing that all girls do about how Nick is ignoring them and how he doesn’t want her around and she’s always overlooked. What’s the word for that? Oh yeah. Whining. Straight up.

In the evening, they go to an antique shop and Dominique wants a fresh start. She claims she’ll pull him first, but Nick instead pulls Astrid right away and gives her the huge plastic ring bracelet. Dominique goes to cry in the bathroom and is throwing a pity party for herself. Rachel says it best when she tells Dominique to get out of her head. Rachel tells the camera that Dominique is analyzing Nick’s actions too much instead of being herself. I couldn’t agree more. The pressure is definitely getting to Dominique.

Rachel and Nick have another conversation after what seems like eons and as one would expect, it goes great. I really like Rachel. She seems cool and super down to earth. Dominique passes by and sees Rachel and Nick kissing, and complains that it’s not fair. Well, life’s not fair. Instead, Dominique calls Nick out for not giving her a fair chance and not coming over to her to ask if she was okay. Never a good thing to confront the person you’re dating for your first conversation. Again, Nick pretty much tells her that their relationship is moving slower than normal and he doesn’t want to string her along. We all know what that means. Dominique, pack your bags. I mean, girls should really watch the show prior to joining to see do’s and do not’s.

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Oddly enough, we didn’t see enough of Brittany again on this date, or ever really, but nevertheless, Rachel got the group date rose. Rachel is finally starting to believe and thinks she could be the last one standing.

They’re all getting ready for the cocktail party and instead, they’re having a pool party. The girls are way too excited and Alexis says it best. 17 girls, 1 pool party, 1 Nick. Let’s see what happens.

Things are already getting awkward, and of course, when we say awkward, the Bachelor world says Corinne. While people are hanging out with Nick, she’s still getting ready. I guess she sets a bouncy house and her and Nick just jump around in there. Then things get weird, real fast. I mean like 0 to 1000 real quick. What makes it even more bizarre is that all the girls are just sitting and watching. Everyone is getting visibly more and more upset, especially Vanessa. I think she does ending confronting him. Then of course, right after their little rendezvous, Corinne goes back to sleep. What is up with this girl?

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Corinne’s thought process

Much to everyone’s surprise, Raven is the one that confronts him first about Corinne. She tells Nick about Corinne’s nanny, Jasmine questions Corinne’s sincerity, Taylor is questioning what Nick is looking for based on the attention given to Corinne. Vanessa is classy AF and the way she sees Nick and Corinne is not right for her. She sits down with Nick and questions what his intentions are. Legit calls him out on it. She says “it was only 2 seconds that I saw, but it was 2 seconds enough for me to question you. I’m not judging Corinne. I’m judging your actions”. Damn, go Vanessa! She goes on to say “are you actually looking for a wife or just someone to have fun with, because then I’d rather you just not give me a rose.” Nick is absolutely speechless and here I am dancing around with my cat in sheer joy that strong women like Vanessa exist. She is a diamond in the rough.

Of course, it’s to be continued like I said and it seems like it’s drama country. Seems like Corinne and Taylor are finally going to have that full on showdown that’s been festering for the last 2 weeks.

Wish them good luck Mimi.

Love,

Didi

 

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